How relationships work

How relationships work

Wednesday, 25 May 2011

Dealing with divorce

Divorce is one thing that no married couple wants to go through. When things become very ugly and the relationship gets damaged beyond repair one has to go through the terrible phase of breaking up with the spouse. This fallout takes a toll on a person’s happiness disturbing him emotionally and mentally. It takes a lot of time for the person to get over the grief and deal with divorce. Some people find it extremely difficult to come out of the trauma they’ve faced. For this it is always better to look at the positive side of the divorce. Think of the main reason for your divorce. Was it an abusive relationship, a nagging wife/husband, a cheating spouse or the complete loss of that spark? Whatever was the reason, the divorce happened for your good. You’ve got rid of the relationship, finally, that never seemed to work!
 After a divorce it’s time to forgive and forget. This definitely is not the easiest of all tasks. This might take time, but have patience and believe that everything is going to be alright.
The worst thing that most people do after a divorce is shunning all contacts and locking themselves up in a room. The situation gets worsened when they listen to those sad songs to make the matters worse or the romantic ones that they used to listen with their spouse. Remember, this is the most terrible thing one could do to him/herself. Stop being lonely and sad and try cheering up yourself. Your friends are going to help you the most in overcoming the grief. Come out of the room, talk to your friends, and start socialising. Getting divorced doesn’t mean your life has ended. You have a long way to go.
Everybody in your social circle knows you’re going through the terrible phase called divorce, so people around you will be ready to cooperate and make you comfortable. Of course nobody can cover up that space you created for your spouse, but then what are friends for? You can always count on your closest friends to help you deal with the loss you’ve suffered.

To come out of the grief as quickly as possible it is best to divert your mind to something you love doing. It could be a dance class, a painting class, a music class, a meditation or yoga or a gym class; it could be anything you love doing. If you love shopping, take company of your closest friend and go shopping. Do all the things you like doing. If you are an adventure lover, go rafting, skiing, bungee jumping, trekking or any other activity you’ve wanted to do. The point is to not sit over and sulk in the grief but come out with a fighting spirit and face the situation boldly.
If nothing seems to help you, take help of a doctor. See a psychologist. He/she will help you overcome the grief and depression you’re going through. Follow your doctor’s advice and find yourself coming out of it real quick!
Dealing with divorce has never been easy but if you have an optimistic approach nothing can stop you from coming out of the situation as a true winner.

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